Skip to main content

Balanced Father

What I am learning is that being a father is all about balance ... about balancing time and priorities so that my family always comes first. It is about keeping the priorities and time of the other things in my life (both personal and work) at appropriate levels.

I heard this term while in high school: they were developing "well-rounded" students, prepared for several futures. What I am learning now is that there needs to be a well-rounded family experience with components of work, service, values, and ... fun.

I have to Plan
Instead of trying to work through what each day presents (as I am doing now), I needs to create a fathering plan that allows me to focus on the important aspects of my life. This planning must involve an examination of my values, setting meaningful family goals, and then acting on the goals ... creating a family calendar.

I have to Teach
I do understand, having worked as a teacher/trainer for as many years as I have that one of my most important missions in Patrick's life is to help him learn those timeless values: faith, honesty, personal responsibility, work, family commitment, and service.

I have to Make Family Time
Recognizing that quality time does not compensate for quantity of time, I need to ensure that a regular amount of time is allocated just for family, regardless of the other commitments in our lives.

I have to Make One-on-One Time
A true relationship with Patrick will be built one activity at a time, generally outside of family activities. I have to remember to never forget the one-on-one focus that he needs from me.

I have to Make Personal Time
Making time for myself is as critical as any of the other things I have listed here. This will allow me to stay sharp over time, providing the strong personality that my family needs.

I have to Stay Focused on Relationships
Here I have to ensure that I nurture and maintain my relationship with Jen. I know that the best thing I can do for Patrick is love her with all my heart. Patrick needs to see the care and love I put into the relationship with his mother, him, family, and friends ... he needs to see how much I value these relationships.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Getting Involved

This is the second night in a row that we were able to spend time and Grandma and Papap's ... Patrick enjoys it so much! We even had a rousing rendition of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" with all five of us involved ... yes, Patrick is pitching in now. He runs from person to person, giving a bit to each one of us ... there is never a dull moment. Tonight, he repeated a new activity from last night. Last night, it was getting everyone involved in chasing him around the house ... tonight, we had this activity, but what we saw was that he wanted to play different games and wanted certain people involved. This is when he went to each person that needed to be involved and grabbed a finger, pulling them along. He even checked every now and then to make sure they were still following. Such an amazing child ... knows how to ensure that we sleep well.

Outside Play

Patrick loves to be outside. When he arrived home yesterday, I was just getting finished with some weeding ... he and Jen immediately jumped in to help. We dragged branches to the pile in the back yard. Then, I found Jen and Patrick getting ready for a bike ride. Wanting to spend time with my wife and son, I opted into the ride. We didn't go far, my back and legs were a bit sore at that point ... but we did get out together as a family. The bike seat we have is not the kind I remember as I grew up. Patrick's is pretty close to my seat, in fact my heels hit the lower part of his seat if I am not paying attention. Despite this, we have a lot of fun. He loves to look around and notices things ... at one point, Jen wandered off and he started calling to her until she headed back to what he considered a safe distance. He is also a boy and likes to play. He "high-fived" my back and spent a few minutes pulling my shirt out. I hope I never forget the head-butt...

Family Time with Shoes

Last night was cool. Patrick was in a playful mood ... dumping food and drinks all over the place, sneaking toys over the back of the couch (then getting upset when I passed them back to him), and climbing over everything. He also got a family game going ... with everyone ready for bed, he had us put his shoes on, then Papa and Mama had to put on their boots. It was all very funny and exciting ... mostly watching his intensity. Then, we had to follow him ... around and around we went. Through the kitchen, into the dining room, through the family room, past the front door and into the kitchen again ... over and over, around and around ... stomping our feet in some sort of family train! Every now and then, Jen or I would fall behind and invariably, Patrick would stop to make sure that we caught back up. We played other games, as well ... but we always seemed to head back to the train ... oh, and don't forget the shoes ...