Fatherhood

At the doctor's office, Jen found out that the uncomfortable feeling was contractions. Patrick was not quite ready to join us, but we were getting close. Jen woke me at about one in the morning to tell me that her contractions had changed. I asked how far apart they were and was told about forty minutes. What I didn't realize at the time was that she had not cleared the data out on her iPad from the previous day's contractions. She woke me again about five in the morning to let me know that the contractions were about ten minutes apart and it was time to head to the hospital. Excited and a bit fearful, I got everything together and we got on the road. Once we arrived at the hospital, we made our way to the delivery ward. Once in a temporary delivery room, the doctor arrived and we found out Jen was much further along than we expected. The nurse was surprised Jen even managed to walk into the hospital. They quickly moved Jen into a regular delivery room where thing...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 5:   Protecting My Family The final article I am writing in this series circles back to where I started. Jen and I decided that we need to be able to protect our family. When it was just the two of us, we had a lot more latitude in what we could do and when. Now that Patrick is in the mix, to be the best father I can (and hence, the best parents we can) I must be able to protect my family. With my wife's blessing, I got my Carry License and plan to carry when it is appropriate and warranted. I also plan to ensure that she is well trained and has plenty of practice with each of the weapons that we bring into the home. This includes safety ... with a small son in the mix, the weapons need to always be secured properly. Shooting is a sport I enjoy and will continue through my life and will strive to ensure both my wife and son have a healthy respect for the sport and the weapons it involves. Part 1:   Where it Started Par...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 4:   Protecting Myself Having served in the US Army and then worked for almost a decade in the Department of Corrections (as a staff member, not an inmate), I have learned that to protect others, I have to first be able to protect myself. I have also seen both the good and the bad in people. For those that do not believe in a Creator (Good and Evil) ... these are the places where you learn that He does exist and is very active in our lives. I've seen small miracles every day ... God, acting in my life. I have also learned that He has a plan for us. God gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want. This does not mean that we do not strive to become the best person we can ... we absolutely must to fulfill His will for each of us. To do this, I must be prepared to defend myself against those that cannot see the simple glory around them. In protecting myself, planning properly to avoid conflict is an important first step ... but being ...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 3:   Shooting as a Sport I've always loved to shoot.  The military taught me to do it correctly and safely ... they also gave me a bit of a competitive edge to what I do on the range. Shooting is a sport of skill: The skills learned are valuable in other aspects of life. Learning to be safe with a gun or rifle teaches responsibility. Learning to hit a target teaches both self-discipline and self-control. Learning to hold a weapon steady and hit the target teaches concentration. Self-reliance and individual esteem are strengthened because of the individuality in the sport. No one has to sit on the sidelines and watch; everyone can take part. This active involvement is important, because sports are fun when everyone can participate personally instead of watching others. Persons with physical disabilities also can take part in shooting, often right alongside other shooters. Shooting is a safe sport:Injuries are extremely rare ...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 2:   Rise in Violent Crime Just as driving home with Patrick and Jen in the car for the first time made me acutely aware of the vehicles around me, I have also become acutely aware of the volume of crime around us. Having been a survivor in several crimes over the years, my awareness of what could potentially go wrong is probably a bit more heightened than most. I had a driver attempt to run me off the road then follow me to work ... following me to work was not such a huge deal since I was going to report the incident as soon as I got there (and I worked in a prison and knew that several of my co-workers would be in the parking lot). What got me was when the Police Office came to take the report and asked if the other driver was armed ... working in a prison, we dealt with weapons, but not generally firearms. I was shaken up for a few days after this incident. While working at the same place, I rented a cheap apartment (being single, this...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 1: Where it Started Growing up, I think I shot a weapon twice ... rifles, definitely no handguns or shotguns.  I remember shooting a black powder kit rifle that my father built that almost took my shoulder off.  My father also had a .22 that we used to kill a few ears of corn. I did get a much stronger exposure to a variety of weapons while serving in the US Army. Over the years, I expanded on the basic skills I developed ... even to the point of competing now and then.  But, as with most things in life, I drifted away from shooting.  I've always seen "range time" as something of a group activity, so the idea of heading out to the range by myself seemed odd.  The fact that I wasn't shooting was certainly not a lack of interest ... more that I just let life get in the way. About six months before Patrick was born, I asked Jen what she wanted for Christmas.  And, even though we had talked about her learning to shoot ...

"I'm building my family tree one child at a time." I remember making this lighthearted joke, not long after Patrick was born. I've been working on our family history for several decades.  Working on computers for a living (and for fun), I've learned a lot about this type of research.  My grandmother got me started ... and encouraged my interest in my family history.  With her assistance, I've compiled quite a bit of information about our family tree and quite a few stories about the people on the tree. Many times, months of research resulted in nothing ... occasionally, some small thread would lead to some larger find.  I've researched lines into the American Revolution (my grandmother always wanted to join the DAR).  I've traced many lines overseas ... Germany, Italy, Ireland, Poland / Austria, and more. But, nowhere along the way have I had such an exciting addition to our tree.  In all my years of tracking down family members, verifying st...

I remember finding out my wife was pregnant; it was uplifting and a bit terrifying at the same time.  A few months later, hearing his heartbeat through the fetal monitor, I was amazed that it could move so fast.  That was the point I think I truly realized where we were headed.  I began to think about what our child's life was to be life ... Throughout Patrick's life, there have been many firsts ... some would say they are all firsts, but these are the ones that locked in as a memory (for me). I can still distinctly remember the first sounds Patrick made when he was being fed ... how can any of us that heard it ever forget that coo.  Not long after that, we got to see his first smile for his grandmother. Neither are we likely to ever forget the effort put in to getting him to crawl.  I do believe he knew what we were doing and just waited for us to let our guard down.  He did eventually get moving, in his own time ... and most likely won't be ...

I was watching " Kung Fu Panda 2 " tonight with Patrick asleep over my shoulder; watching Po as he learned about his parents and who his father really was.  It got me thinking about who my son will be and the pride I will always feel for him. I was also remembering the day he first came into my life. When Jen and I got married, my father told me about his wedding day ... how my mother winked to him as she came down the isle and he knew everything would be OK.  As I saw my bride, she took my breath away.  Literally.  I forgot to breathe.  Partway down the isle, she winked at me (I wasn't the only one that heard that story) and I too knew, deep inside me, that everything would be OK.  Little did I know the journey we were beginning together. At the time, I imagined I knew the height of emotion; of the love in my life.  Boy, was I wrong ... that day, as Patrick struggled to come into the world, I saw a level of love and trust in my wife's eyes that ...