Fatherhood

At the golf-scramble the other day, there was golf,  a dinner, a silent auction and a live auction. Needless to say, there were quite a few members of the family, co-workers, and people from the community present. What got to me were the children present. There were about six or seven toddlers ... all of them were very cute, with little hats when they were outside, bring carried by doting parents, being fawned over by loving family or friends who just wanted to see an amazing, loving smile. I still think that if you lined them up, side-by-side, that Patrick would be the cutest of them all, but I expect that each of the parents there would tell you the same thing. But, in this case, I'm right!

Are there good parents, great parents, ... bad parents? I recently saw parents that took their two young daughters to a concert. These two girls were not just bored ... they were in some pain; the music was very loud. Thankfully, one of the security personnel stopped by about half way through the show and dropped off ear plugs for the girls. Were these bad parents? Probably not ... I suspect they made one bad decision (to take the girls to the show) and made it a bit worse (by attempting to stay). Part of me can understand the decisions; the tickets were over seventy dollars each ... but, part of me does not understand the decision to let the cost of a ticket over-ride the health of their kids. Many parents, most likely, fall into all these categories at one time or another. As I am learning, being a parent is not a one-time thing, it evolves and changes over time.

The help of other parents is always appreciated. Jen and I have gotten all kinds of advice ... from the practical to the insane (generally, these come from parents to non-parents). Yesterday, at church, I think we got our first true help from a parent ... and we don't even know who she is ... Patrick was getting a bit antsy when the woman in front of us reached into her bag and pulled out two children's books. She turned a bit and handed them to us saying, "I've got a whole bag-full." Later on, she swapped out these two books for two more ... incredible. In the seventeen months since he was born, this is the first real assistance we have gotten from a parent (that wasn't being paid for the help). Very cool ... I wish we had gotten her name.

My spell-check is highlighting the word "texting" ... not in the computer's dictionary.  In 21st century lexicon, texting is both a noun and an adjective ... both an object and a description of an activity. To me ... a computer squid, it seems odd, but texting is something I've simply learned to live with.  I have always preferred talking to someone rather than sending a text or speaking with a machine.  I know computers, but have little interest in living large parts of my life on them ... there needs to be, as with anything, a balance. Over the years, I've developed a philosophy in relation to communications (outside of work).  I've always kept my phone separate from my e-mail separate from my iPOD/iPAD with my calendar.  Only recently have I even spent the money on a texting plan (kind of got battered into that one).  I have always explained the philosophy, in part, as keeping the devices separate based on the type of use as a means of maintaining ...

This is advice that Bill Gates gave at a high school about things they did not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teaching has created a generation of children with no concept of reality and how this concept sets them up for failure in real life. RULE 1 Life is not fair ... get used to it. RULE 2 The world will not care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself. RULE 3 You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice president with a car phone, until you earn both. RULE 4 If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure. RULE 5 Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping they called it Opportunity. RULE 6 If you mess up...