Fatherhood

My attitude reflects in my son ... I can see him learning from me daily. In a store last night, I started to get irritated when someone stepped between my wife and I, getting in line a little bit early. This is the same store that I had a major issue with about a month ago, so I wasn't in the greatest frame of mind to being with. This woman noticed me calling Jen (amazingly, it only took calling her about six times, or so) and realized what had happened. Not only did she step back to let me through, but she was pleasant about it and struck up a conversation with Jen and I about Patrick ... This all got me thinking about what Patrick reflects about me ... need to do more thinking on this topic!

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 5:   Protecting My Family The final article I am writing in this series circles back to where I started. Jen and I decided that we need to be able to protect our family. When it was just the two of us, we had a lot more latitude in what we could do and when. Now that Patrick is in the mix, to be the best father I can (and hence, the best parents we can) I must be able to protect my family. With my wife's blessing, I got my Carry License and plan to carry when it is appropriate and warranted. I also plan to ensure that she is well trained and has plenty of practice with each of the weapons that we bring into the home. This includes safety ... with a small son in the mix, the weapons need to always be secured properly. Shooting is a sport I enjoy and will continue through my life and will strive to ensure both my wife and son have a healthy respect for the sport and the weapons it involves. Part 1:   Where it Started Par...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 4:   Protecting Myself Having served in the US Army and then worked for almost a decade in the Department of Corrections (as a staff member, not an inmate), I have learned that to protect others, I have to first be able to protect myself. I have also seen both the good and the bad in people. For those that do not believe in a Creator (Good and Evil) ... these are the places where you learn that He does exist and is very active in our lives. I've seen small miracles every day ... God, acting in my life. I have also learned that He has a plan for us. God gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want. This does not mean that we do not strive to become the best person we can ... we absolutely must to fulfill His will for each of us. To do this, I must be prepared to defend myself against those that cannot see the simple glory around them. In protecting myself, planning properly to avoid conflict is an important first step ... but being ...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 3:   Shooting as a Sport I've always loved to shoot.  The military taught me to do it correctly and safely ... they also gave me a bit of a competitive edge to what I do on the range. Shooting is a sport of skill: The skills learned are valuable in other aspects of life. Learning to be safe with a gun or rifle teaches responsibility. Learning to hit a target teaches both self-discipline and self-control. Learning to hold a weapon steady and hit the target teaches concentration. Self-reliance and individual esteem are strengthened because of the individuality in the sport. No one has to sit on the sidelines and watch; everyone can take part. This active involvement is important, because sports are fun when everyone can participate personally instead of watching others. Persons with physical disabilities also can take part in shooting, often right alongside other shooters. Shooting is a safe sport:Injuries are extremely rare ...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 2:   Rise in Violent Crime Just as driving home with Patrick and Jen in the car for the first time made me acutely aware of the vehicles around me, I have also become acutely aware of the volume of crime around us. Having been a survivor in several crimes over the years, my awareness of what could potentially go wrong is probably a bit more heightened than most. I had a driver attempt to run me off the road then follow me to work ... following me to work was not such a huge deal since I was going to report the incident as soon as I got there (and I worked in a prison and knew that several of my co-workers would be in the parking lot). What got me was when the Police Office came to take the report and asked if the other driver was armed ... working in a prison, we dealt with weapons, but not generally firearms. I was shaken up for a few days after this incident. While working at the same place, I rented a cheap apartment (being single, this...

Carrying (CCW) as a Father Part 1: Where it Started Growing up, I think I shot a weapon twice ... rifles, definitely no handguns or shotguns.  I remember shooting a black powder kit rifle that my father built that almost took my shoulder off.  My father also had a .22 that we used to kill a few ears of corn. I did get a much stronger exposure to a variety of weapons while serving in the US Army. Over the years, I expanded on the basic skills I developed ... even to the point of competing now and then.  But, as with most things in life, I drifted away from shooting.  I've always seen "range time" as something of a group activity, so the idea of heading out to the range by myself seemed odd.  The fact that I wasn't shooting was certainly not a lack of interest ... more that I just let life get in the way. About six months before Patrick was born, I asked Jen what she wanted for Christmas.  And, even though we had talked about her learning to shoot ...

... to be Fathers? My parents say that Patrick has us very well trained ... and he well might. He lifts his arms and we lift him up.  He points and we carry him in the direction he wants to go.  He throws something, we give it back for him to throw again. Parents that know us roll their eyes (some unspoken knowledge, I expect). I suspect they are laughing with us ... As we teach him how to live life ... to love God, respect his family, and to be a productive member of society ... he is teaching us about life, as well.  What those lessons are, I'm not one hundred percent sure, but I am certain they will be valuable to me in my future endeavors.

I work on computers for a living.  I've been working on computers since I was ten years old ... 34 years, at this point.  And, even though it seems like I started only yesterday, I have found that my 14 month old son can teach me a thing or two ... Recently, he was playing on the mouse (in particular, with the wheel) and the icons on my screen started getting smaller.  Never having seen this type of a change with the mouse, I tried to duplicate what he was doing ... to no avail.  After some research (HOURS), I found out that with Windows Vista, you can hold down the Control Key and spin the wheel to change the icon size on the screen ... way to keep your father on his toes, Patrick! I realize that children today are getting more and more savvy with technology, but I truly never imagined being taught basic functionality by him before he at least reached the age of three.

It started with an attempt to crawl that looked more like something the military spent weeks getting me to perfect (the "low crawl") ... Patrick got that down in a few minutes.  After all the photos, videos, and calls to our grandparents, we marveled at how amazing our son was. Then, the crawl became something that involved all four limbs; quite a bump up from just his arms.  It wasn't long before he was moving quick enough to get his fingers into the door as I was closing it. The primal scream of pain was unreal ... yet, all too real.  The little man's finger was dented ... I still feel a bit guilty today and it has been months since the incident. Then, just as Patrick was getting the crawling down, he managed to pull himself into a standing position without any help.  About that time, he took a nose dive off the bed into a popcorn bowl ... it was hard not to laugh as he cried in pain. He loved playing with a fire engine that he can sit on and in...

For those that have been enjoying the humor in my posts ... sorry, this one's more serious. I've been thinking about what I need to do, as Patrick's father, when he gets older and transitions into a young adult, then to manhood. I need to be a role model .  It is my firm suspicion that there nothing more important to raising a responsible young man than modeling the behavior I hope he will embrace when he becomes a man.  Patrick will learn more from watching how I react and behave in given circumstances than he will from almost anything I tell him.  Jen pointed out the other day that I can get quite irritable with other drivers ... to the point of getting vocal (yes, I can yell and scream at times).  I definitely need to change that type of behavior, before he learns it from me. I need to teach him how to  properly  plan for the future .  Too many men go through life just reacting to what is happening around them ... I know I spent a lot o...