Fatherhood

Patrick has always had a beautiful smile ... that widens dramatically when he laughs, which is quite often. Those that know him have all commented on his beautiful smile! Last night I noticed a jump in the amount of facial expressions he shows. He may have shown more expression earlier ... and, I just noticed it ... hmmm. We were sharing some Animal Crackers when I asked if he wanted more. He lifted his shoulders, giving me a big grin, and walked off. Later, sitting on a chair, I swear he gave me a flat smile ... almost like he didn't want to smile, but still felt a need to. Dancing with his mother, he gave a quirky smile as he rocked his head from side to side. These are just some of the expressions I have seen ... and recently realized I was seeing. So amazing to be a father!

Two days ago, I was getting Patrick dressed ... he was home sick and I stayed to take care of him for the day. After getting him dressed, we played. At one point, he looked like he was getting sleepy and I took him back to my bedroom and put him on the bed. What I didn't notice ... but he did ... was a clean diaper sitting in the middle of the bed. He got hold of it and started swatting at me. We both laughed. Jen loved the story as I told it to her the next morning ... what a cool way to start Mama's day! This morning, as I was getting ready for work, Patrick started playing Peek-a-Boo with me ... tilting his head in from the hall, "Peek," then back into the hall again. Over and over we played, smiles on everyone's faces. He has this incredible laugh that just reverberates ... anytime I can get him to laugh, I go for it ... There are so many things that little man does that make me smile ... the list could go on forever!

I love to watch the way my son's mind works. I had removed him from the cart (yes, the one with the plastic car on the front ... I've said before that he loves to drive) ... and had him following me. I figured that we could check the meat prices while Jen got the lunch meat. About fifty feet away, he realized where he was and turned, with a yell, toward his Mama. He started running her way ... arms back, like a jet fighter. Then, Jen dropped to one knee and put out her arms toward him ... at which point, he turned ninety degrees to the right ... We both laughed watching him as a made a complete circuit around to sneak up on his mother from behind ... with a massive smile on his face. As I said ... I love to watch the way my son's mind works.

Having to work late ... I miss my wife and son. I love being there when he gets home ... I see that smile light up on his face as he sees me. I get that first hug and sometimes, even a kiss on the cheek. Some days, I take him out to the Mustang so he can "drive," having to remember to reset all the lights, vents, radio, and mirrors. Other days, he heads straight for the cupboard for food ... it is truly amazing how much food one little man can put away sometimes. Then, there are times ... those truly rare days when all he wants is Papa time. I have to hold him, snuggle with him, and generally have him nearby no matter what I want to do. I miss them ...

Jen and Patrick found the top to a spray bottle last night; we had purchased it with some laundry supplies. This particular one had never been put into anything; so it made a great toy. At least, he thought so ... the tight grip on it as he tried to squeeze the trigger and bright grin were pretty good indicators. After watching him work the trigger for a few minutes, I grabbed a water bottle and put the stem into the water and gave it a few squeezes. Once I figured out I had to unlock it, we got some water spraying through the nozzle. After five attempts where he sprayed himself in the face ... to his obvious delight, I showed him how to turn it around. "Spray Mama," I said ... and off he went! Then, once Mama and the floor had been doused ... several trips back and forth, she told him to "get Papa," and it was my turn to get wet. All this was accompanied by beautiful childish laughter. He even understood the "No" when he tried to spray the o...

OK, I am a father ... My son has THE PERFECT SMILE! Am I just saying that because he is my son ... maybe.  But, it is true. When he smiles, he lights up a room.  It is one of those smiles that you cannot help but notice. When he is smiling at someone, they can feel the love and happiness he feels when he is around them. When he is laughing ... the smile is accompanied by peals of the best laughter. My son has THE PERFECT SMILE. OK, I am a father ... and he is my son!

OK, it's not just water, but let me have some  delusions.  This article gives a whole new meaning to baby shower  ... no cakes or presents this time.  Although, for all the times when fatherhood seemed challenging, this just makes me laugh. Patrick was less than an hour old ... one of the nurses was changing him when felt something warm on my chest.  He managed to pee on me when I was standing over five feet away! The nurses were kind enough to offer towels (although there was little odor at the time) and I did manage to get cleaned up. Since he's been home, we get the random "fountain" that is more humorous than anything else ... and most often, these fountains are for my benefit. It all started with one of his amazing smiles as I was changing his diaper ... something I'm not totally adverse to anymore.  As soon as the diaper was lifted off ... so, the flow began.  After several soakings, I've learned to watch for that smile ... with the dia...

Patrick's has had an amazing smile since very early on ... not long after he opened his eyes, when he was much smaller than he is now.  I watched in awe as his first tooth came in ... then my father and I spent many days and nights allowing him to chew on our finger tips and knuckles, attempting to sooth his pain. More teeth arrived in quick succession ... again, the gnawing of our fingers and knuckles along with a bright smile.  This time our thumbs took the brunt of his teething.  His teeth were all on top at this point, so again, it was amusing. Next, the lower teeth came in as his smile brightened the room even further.  As a new father, I figured things were going very smoothly, although I had to make sure my thumb nail was facing his teeth to take the brunt of the bite ... pretty sharp for teeth that small. Now, he's got a pretty good set of tiny teeth on top and on bottom, with a glorious smile that melts my heart.  We've had to stop the biting as...

Due to timing (my new job), Jennifer's been handling a lot of the delivery, both to and from day-care lately.  Patrick seems none the worse for wear, but I do miss the look on his face as he recognizes people he knows in the morning and the look of pure joy as he spots me in the afternoon. A few days ago, I got to drop him off and pick him up due to a change in Jen's work schedule. What an experience this was.  The drop off went normal ... it was when I went to pick him up that I got a bit of a shock ... I knew, logically, that Patrick was being moved up to a new room.  Basically, he is still assigned to the infant room, but spends part of the day with the toddlers; getting him acclimated to the new teachers, room, and schedule.  Soon, he will be in the new room for toddlers full time. What I wasn't prepared for was how small and fragile the infants were.  I do remember holding him with one arm and remarking to myself how small and fragile  he was. ...

I remember finding out my wife was pregnant; it was uplifting and a bit terrifying at the same time.  A few months later, hearing his heartbeat through the fetal monitor, I was amazed that it could move so fast.  That was the point I think I truly realized where we were headed.  I began to think about what our child's life was to be life ... Throughout Patrick's life, there have been many firsts ... some would say they are all firsts, but these are the ones that locked in as a memory (for me). I can still distinctly remember the first sounds Patrick made when he was being fed ... how can any of us that heard it ever forget that coo.  Not long after that, we got to see his first smile for his grandmother. Neither are we likely to ever forget the effort put in to getting him to crawl.  I do believe he knew what we were doing and just waited for us to let our guard down.  He did eventually get moving, in his own time ... and most likely won't be ...