13 July 2012

Balanced Father

What I am learning is that being a father is all about balance ... about balancing time and priorities so that my family always comes first. It is about keeping the priorities and time of the other things in my life (both personal and work) at appropriate levels.

I heard this term while in high school: they were developing "well-rounded" students, prepared for several futures. What I am learning now is that there needs to be a well-rounded family experience with components of work, service, values, and ... fun.

I have to Plan
Instead of trying to work through what each day presents (as I am doing now), I needs to create a fathering plan that allows me to focus on the important aspects of my life. This planning must involve an examination of my values, setting meaningful family goals, and then acting on the goals ... creating a family calendar.

I have to Teach
I do understand, having worked as a teacher/trainer for as many years as I have that one of my most important missions in Patrick's life is to help him learn those timeless values: faith, honesty, personal responsibility, work, family commitment, and service.

I have to Make Family Time
Recognizing that quality time does not compensate for quantity of time, I need to ensure that a regular amount of time is allocated just for family, regardless of the other commitments in our lives.

I have to Make One-on-One Time
A true relationship with Patrick will be built one activity at a time, generally outside of family activities. I have to remember to never forget the one-on-one focus that he needs from me.

I have to Make Personal Time
Making time for myself is as critical as any of the other things I have listed here. This will allow me to stay sharp over time, providing the strong personality that my family needs.

I have to Stay Focused on Relationships
Here I have to ensure that I nurture and maintain my relationship with Jen. I know that the best thing I can do for Patrick is love her with all my heart. Patrick needs to see the care and love I put into the relationship with his mother, him, family, and friends ... he needs to see how much I value these relationships.

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