Skip to main content

Helpless Father

I felt helpless and he was helpless ... what an amazing way to start a life.

"I think what scared us the most was they hand you this helpless thing, wheel you down to the car, and wave goodbye as you drive off.  And, there is no owner's manual; nothing to help you with the next 18 years." (J. Higgins) 
Wow ... there's more than a little truth there.

 The first few days in the hospital were pretty good.  There were plenty of people to help, both hospital staff and family stopping by ... they'd even take him (happily) if we needed rest.

 I did learn, while we were there, how protective I could be.  Patrick was circumcised.  And, almost an hour after they took him for the procedure we walked down to get him.  Big mistake.  Apparently, we should have waited ... the doctor had finished just before we arrived.  As the nurse applied an ointment, Patrick let out a wail unlike anything I've ever heard before or since.  Had the doctor been within arms length, I probably would have decked him.  That scream hit some primal nerve deep within in my head.

 Then, as in Johnna's quote, we got walked (Jen was in a wheelchair until we got outside) to the car ... I will say that the hospital staff did an amazing job making sure we were as OK as possible before we left.

 Very quickly it was just us ... I don't think I've ever driven so carefully and been aware of all the other cars around me, as well as both of my precious passengers.  Only a few decades to go ...

 I am a guy after all, as well as a father ... who really needs an owner's manual, we can figure it out.
Labels:
Location: Columbus, OH, USA

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Terror or Anger

Jennifer and I woke about twenty minutes ago to Patrick crying ... nothing unusual. I asked her to get him since I have to start getting ready for work in about three hours (yes, I have to work on a Saturday). Where things became unusual was the loud, sustained crash, and Patrick's cries rising to a hefty scream. Being the concerned parent that I am ... with visions of his changing table collapsed on top of him, I rushed to their aid. "What was that?" I cried. Jennifer, weakly replied, "I fell down the stairs." With Patrick screaming at the top of his lungs, I think I actually asked her to repeat what she said. I found my wife sitting, with her legs out and my son in her arms, at the bottom of the stairs. Asking if she and Patrick were OK was mixed into confused questioning about what happened. Somehow, her feet went out from under her (we suspect a couple of the leaves that Patrick likes to play with were on the steps). While my real concern was i
Post a Comment
Read more

"Hello?"

We walked into my parents house ... looking for Papap. "Hello," we called. "'Ello," Patrick mimicked. "Hello," we called again, laughing a bit. "'Ello," Patrick mimicked again, delighted that he could get us laughing that easily. Out in the back yard, he went for the shovel (small blue plastic one I got for him a while back). "Maybe he should go shovel in the sand-box," Papap said ... Off he went to the sand-box, lugging the shovel. Later I asked him if he wanted raisins. Shaking his head no, he headed for the fridge. "Eeze," he said ... Cheese, he intended. His comprehension and vocal capacity is growing by leaps and bounds!
Post a Comment
Read more

Happiness Is ...

Last night was a long night ... Patrick is either sick or having a reaction to something. He has a temperature, is in obvious pain, and has a good rash covering most of his body. We have opted to wait and call his doctor ... rather than a hospital run. They will not do any more than we are with medication for the pain and temperature. But, that is not what I am writing about this morning. What I want to touch on is ... Happiness. Children know something about happiness ... the younger they are the more they show a true understanding of happiness. They are often happy for no reason ... their eyes are open and Mama and Papa are there. I think, in there is something to remember ... sometimes, we need to be happy for no reason. I keep thinking about how easy it is to take the reason that someone is happy. This all came about, not because of Patrick's issues last night, but because of a few blissful minutes when I got back to the bedroom to find my wife and son asleep on t
Post a Comment
Read more