Fatherhood

Patrick has always had a beautiful smile ... that widens dramatically when he laughs, which is quite often. Those that know him have all commented on his beautiful smile! Last night I noticed a jump in the amount of facial expressions he shows. He may have shown more expression earlier ... and, I just noticed it ... hmmm. We were sharing some Animal Crackers when I asked if he wanted more. He lifted his shoulders, giving me a big grin, and walked off. Later, sitting on a chair, I swear he gave me a flat smile ... almost like he didn't want to smile, but still felt a need to. Dancing with his mother, he gave a quirky smile as he rocked his head from side to side. These are just some of the expressions I have seen ... and recently realized I was seeing. So amazing to be a father!

Yesterday was about games ... I picked Patrick up from school, as I got off work. This way, I got a few hours with him by myself. We threw balls ... he particularly liked bouncing the ball off my head. We turned the lights for the pumpkin on and off ... you should have heard the excitement when I connected the main lights to that switch. He loved turning the sounds on and off on the door (Halloween decoration). We also had a good meal ... nice and clean for once, although he did get to crush two crackers and dump them on the floor. I will say, in his defense, that he grabbed the whisk broom and helped clean them up. We watched Tom and Jerry ... funny for an eighteen month old and his father. We bounced on Papa ... over and over ... good workout. Simple fun as a father ... smiles and laughter for hours on end!

Trouble with the stairs again. Patrick was following me down the stairs. I had already gotten downstairs and was sitting in front of the computer when I heard him heading down the steps. I issued a gentle reminder for him to be careful when I heard the thumping start. Knowing I was too far from the steps, there was nothing I could do but watch. As I described it to Jen ... "Think of the gingerbread man pose. Put it upside down and on the bottom step and that's what I saw rolling down our stairs." Patrick landed with a remarkably gentle thump and stared at the ceiling for a few seconds before the screaming started. By that time, I had gotten to him and held him close until Mama arrived to take over. Amazingly, there didn't even seem to be a bump on his head ... No damage done ... but, what a scare!

What a glorious afternoon ... It was a simple day, a Saturday, with nothing to do. Just me ... my son, and my wife. And, we did nothing ... OK, maybe a bit of television and a few diaper changes. Showers and a bath, but nothing more than that. Then, we got to the late afternoon and Patrick kind of went ballistic ... crying, no screaming ... We tried several things and I finally carried him to our bedroom where I started to bounce him ... the tears faded ... and bounce him, some more ... and he simply whimpered ... and bounced him, some more. Eventually, he fell asleep and, minus a quick shift to the center of the bed, he slept soundly for several hours. ... what a glorious afternoon.

Patrick loves to be outside. When he arrived home yesterday, I was just getting finished with some weeding ... he and Jen immediately jumped in to help. We dragged branches to the pile in the back yard. Then, I found Jen and Patrick getting ready for a bike ride. Wanting to spend time with my wife and son, I opted into the ride. We didn't go far, my back and legs were a bit sore at that point ... but we did get out together as a family. The bike seat we have is not the kind I remember as I grew up. Patrick's is pretty close to my seat, in fact my heels hit the lower part of his seat if I am not paying attention. Despite this, we have a lot of fun. He loves to look around and notices things ... at one point, Jen wandered off and he started calling to her until she headed back to what he considered a safe distance. He is also a boy and likes to play. He "high-fived" my back and spent a few minutes pulling my shirt out. I hope I never forget the head-butt...

It's now official, our walls have been decorated by our son for the first time. Patrick had been drawing in his coloring book with a marker. He wandered off, as he does at times. Not hearing him for a few seconds, I wandered into the dining room to check on him. What I discovered was an entire wall covered in orange marker ... just at his shoulder level. He looked at me with a look of excitement in his eyes. He was so proud of the artwork he prepared for us ... I was a bit angry, but more amused (though I couldn't let it show). Thankfully, it was a washable marker and a wet sponge made short work of the artwork ... Patrick was a bit upset that it was gone; that is until he found the raisins. Have I said before that he is ALWAYS hungry these days ... UPDATE: Now, not only have we done artwork on the wall, we have decorated one of the toilet covers ... with the red Permanent Marker he found!

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak; and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid; one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat and humble and gentle in victory. Build me a son whose wished will not take the place of deeds; a son who will know Thee -- and that to know himself is the foundation stone of knowledge. Lead him, I pray, not in the path of ease and comfort, but under the stress and spur of difficulties and challenge. Here let him learn to stand up in the storm; here let him learn compassion for those who fail. Build me a son whose heart will be clear, whose goal will be high, a son who will master himself before he seeks to master other men, one who will reach into the future, yet never forget the past. And after all these things are his, add, I pray, enough of a sense of humor, so that he may always be serious, yet never take himself too seriously. Give him humility, so that he may always reme...

The Golden Rule I did not just grow up. I was taught ... ... to speak when I enter a room. ... to say please and thank you. ... to have respect for my elders, and to get up off my lazy butt and let the elder in the room have my chair. ... to say, "Yes, Sir," and "No, Sir." ... to lend  helping hand to those in need. ... to hold the door for the person behind me. ... to say "Excuse me," when it is needed. ... and to love people for who they are  and not for what I can get from them . I was also taught to treat people the way that I want to be treated.

My attitude reflects in my son ... I can see him learning from me daily. In a store last night, I started to get irritated when someone stepped between my wife and I, getting in line a little bit early. This is the same store that I had a major issue with about a month ago, so I wasn't in the greatest frame of mind to being with. This woman noticed me calling Jen (amazingly, it only took calling her about six times, or so) and realized what had happened. Not only did she step back to let me through, but she was pleasant about it and struck up a conversation with Jen and I about Patrick ... This all got me thinking about what Patrick reflects about me ... need to do more thinking on this topic!

Last night, Jen was in a class and I got Patrick for a few hours ... Papa time. We took some time and visited his grandparents; two of Patrick's cousins were also there, so it became a cool visit. Of course, we had to get in some Tractor time ... can't forget that. Then, we headed out ... Jen still had about thirty minutes left, so I decided to just drive around the area. I was comfortable in the car ... Patrick, different situation. As he started crying ... I tried singing (this has worked before) and to my amazement, it only took two rounds of "Row, Row, Row your boat" for him to quiet down. About a dozen rounds later, I stopped as my throat started getting strained. Then, the crying kicked in again. After about three of these sets and about twenty minutes later, I glanced over my shoulder to find him fast asleep. I kept singing ... slowly dropping the volume. Just as I stopped singing, Jen called to say she was on her way home. I turned the car arou...

We took Patrick to his cousin's volleyball game the other night. What a terror that could have been ... What fun we had! We got there and Patrick got fixated on the net bag of volleyballs that the girls were using ... he simply sat back and watched as they added and removed balls. Then, he sat on my lap as the girls practiced serving over the net ... all patience. Once the balls were back in the net, he did pick up the bag and attempt to carry it off the court ... I was impressed that he managed to get it off the ground; it was bigger than he is. As the game got going, he again sat patiently in my lap and watched the game; clapping at all the appropriate times. When his cousin got up to serve, he was wildly cheering and calling her name ... could you ask for anything more of an eighteen month old son! I couldn't believe how much fun he had and how well he behaved ... what a cool night!

Two days ago, I was getting Patrick dressed ... he was home sick and I stayed to take care of him for the day. After getting him dressed, we played. At one point, he looked like he was getting sleepy and I took him back to my bedroom and put him on the bed. What I didn't notice ... but he did ... was a clean diaper sitting in the middle of the bed. He got hold of it and started swatting at me. We both laughed. Jen loved the story as I told it to her the next morning ... what a cool way to start Mama's day! This morning, as I was getting ready for work, Patrick started playing Peek-a-Boo with me ... tilting his head in from the hall, "Peek," then back into the hall again. Over and over we played, smiles on everyone's faces. He has this incredible laugh that just reverberates ... anytime I can get him to laugh, I go for it ... There are so many things that little man does that make me smile ... the list could go on forever!

I love to watch the way my son's mind works. I had removed him from the cart (yes, the one with the plastic car on the front ... I've said before that he loves to drive) ... and had him following me. I figured that we could check the meat prices while Jen got the lunch meat. About fifty feet away, he realized where he was and turned, with a yell, toward his Mama. He started running her way ... arms back, like a jet fighter. Then, Jen dropped to one knee and put out her arms toward him ... at which point, he turned ninety degrees to the right ... We both laughed watching him as a made a complete circuit around to sneak up on his mother from behind ... with a massive smile on his face. As I said ... I love to watch the way my son's mind works.

  Can you believe that I had no idea how to spell "croup" two days ago? Thank you Google. I arrived at my parents to find my wife and son in the bathroom with the shower running ... I am not sure what thoughts were running around in my head as I heard where they were, but croup was not one of them. Then, I heard it ... croup. And ... so aptly named. In anguish, I was trying to remember everything I knew about child-rearing and croup ... it didn't take but a second, or two. Again, thank you Google. After a quick refresher on what we were up against, I made a quick trip (with Jen ... my parents gave us a break from watching Patrick, knowing we were heading for a long night) ... to get a cool humidifier for his room. Everything together, we headed home. He did get to sleep, after two rough attempts where he coughed himself awake, having trouble breathing because of all the crying he was doing. He did get to sleep ... in between his parents, both watching him ...

At the golf-scramble the other day, there was golf,  a dinner, a silent auction and a live auction. Needless to say, there were quite a few members of the family, co-workers, and people from the community present. What got to me were the children present. There were about six or seven toddlers ... all of them were very cute, with little hats when they were outside, bring carried by doting parents, being fawned over by loving family or friends who just wanted to see an amazing, loving smile. I still think that if you lined them up, side-by-side, that Patrick would be the cutest of them all, but I expect that each of the parents there would tell you the same thing. But, in this case, I'm right!

The strength of a small town was hammered home yesterday. I just spent the day away from my wife and son, helping out at a golf-scramble in memory of a tremendous young man that I worked with. His loss was a terrible accident. He came into my life for a short time, but was a part of this community. There were people in pain, but coming together to help each other come to grips with what has happened and make it into something positive ... there was so much raised for his fiance and son-to-be ... and it wasn't about the money; at the core, this was about helping each other. I spent a few hours talking to his grandfather ... every topic under the sun.  The biggest thing that ran through the conversations was the value in living in a small town ... a tight-knit community. As I sat thinking about all this last night, I realized that these are the same values that I was raised with as a "military brat." My parents were from this same type of town and had instilled th...

Having to work late ... I miss my wife and son. I love being there when he gets home ... I see that smile light up on his face as he sees me. I get that first hug and sometimes, even a kiss on the cheek. Some days, I take him out to the Mustang so he can "drive," having to remember to reset all the lights, vents, radio, and mirrors. Other days, he heads straight for the cupboard for food ... it is truly amazing how much food one little man can put away sometimes. Then, there are times ... those truly rare days when all he wants is Papa time. I have to hold him, snuggle with him, and generally have him nearby no matter what I want to do. I miss them ...

As a parent ... raised in the days of voice contact, seeing children converse in the same room via cell phones and fingers ... I feel like a throw-back, a relic of some lost age. Even today, I find myself cringing when I call and get an automated system. What happened to our conversational skills. The question today is, who needs a voice when our children can tap on a touch screen faster and more efficiently than any of us ever though possible. Hung up on inflection and tone, can't we just hop on Skype for those important conversations (yes, you can connect Skype directly to the television). Parents are important in this new age of technology ... someone has to buy the phone, maintain the plan, and replace damaged devices. We even have to tell our children to stop texting at the dinner table, as well as to turn the phone off before going to bed. Being a parent and watching my child's fascination ... and, eventually becoming an extension of the phone, I sometimes wonde...

I think I have told the story of our walk by the church where someone was riding the tractor, mowing the lawn. As the story goes, I said "mower" to Patrick ... and got "more" in sign back. This trend has continued, especially since he loves riding on tractor/mowers. We found a kids mower today ... green and yellow plastic; it ticks when pushed or pulled. This mower has a knob that rotates, as well as one that can be pushed/pulled. It even has a starter; you give it a pull to hear the engine start up. Patrick has rarely let it go since we got home ...

Mama and I were trying to get ready for the day. Having a little boy in the mix certainly makes this a longer, more interesting process than it ever was when we were single (and I use to wonder what took Jen so long to get ready ... six hours today). I had him, playing on the bed, as we approached his nap time. He was diving on pillows, trying to give me a heart-attack as he tried repeatedly to topple off the bed. Eventually, he dropped over my legs and I bounced him for a bit (not too long ... need to work on those abs). I grabbed him and flipped him to the other side of the bed and began to pat him on the back. Within seconds he was asleep ... two hour nap! Then, the day began ...

As we picked up Patrick from daycare, he got all excited and rolled over this blue padded cylinder they had in the room. He promptly hit his forehead and started crying (we did not see the impact on the forehead until later). It was actually pretty funny other than the crying (yes Mama, it was OK to laugh). His crying settled down very quickly ... even with Papa holding him. A typical incident ... as I have written about previously, he does have a tendency to Bonk His Head . As the night went on and we went through various games, such as Papa laying on the floor and Patrick jumping on top of him ... the bonks to the head continued. Thankfully, being that close to him, I was able to minimize the damage to the reddened bruise on his forehead. ALL BOY!

Last night, we found that Patrick's little Leap Frog Fire Engine was broken. Well ... basically, the batteries corroded and it no longer worked ... played music and honked. Thinking that it was a pretty simple design, I decided to take it apart to see if I could clean the leads and possibly get it working again.  As I removed the dozen or so one-inch screws, Patrick decided to step in and help. With Patrick's help (Mama's distracting him at key moments), I managed to get the steering wheel disconnected and the wheels out to finally get it apart ... basically to find that the sections I needed into were deeper inside (more screws ... more complications). I decided to let it be and search for a few one later. Today, I searched ... and searched ... and searched (yes, I teach computers and pride myself on being able to locate just about anything ... a detailed knowledge of databases helps).  Apparently, it was a limited release and I really didn't find anything ...

Jen and Patrick found the top to a spray bottle last night; we had purchased it with some laundry supplies. This particular one had never been put into anything; so it made a great toy. At least, he thought so ... the tight grip on it as he tried to squeeze the trigger and bright grin were pretty good indicators. After watching him work the trigger for a few minutes, I grabbed a water bottle and put the stem into the water and gave it a few squeezes. Once I figured out I had to unlock it, we got some water spraying through the nozzle. After five attempts where he sprayed himself in the face ... to his obvious delight, I showed him how to turn it around. "Spray Mama," I said ... and off he went! Then, once Mama and the floor had been doused ... several trips back and forth, she told him to "get Papa," and it was my turn to get wet. All this was accompanied by beautiful childish laughter. He even understood the "No" when he tried to spray the o...

OK, I am a father ... My son has THE PERFECT SMILE! Am I just saying that because he is my son ... maybe.  But, it is true. When he smiles, he lights up a room.  It is one of those smiles that you cannot help but notice. When he is smiling at someone, they can feel the love and happiness he feels when he is around them. When he is laughing ... the smile is accompanied by peals of the best laughter. My son has THE PERFECT SMILE. OK, I am a father ... and he is my son!

I saw this one a few days ago ... HILARIOUS! Mrs. Ravioli was visiting her son Anthony for dinner. He lives with a female roommate, Maria. During the course of the meal, his mother could not help but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her even more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mother's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates." About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" "Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." So Anthony sat down and wrote an email: Dear Mama, ...